January 29, 2013

It’s still January?

Bleh.

Feel free to call me the Easter Bunny! Or Mother Hen, if you’d prefer …?

Lots of pressure down there, and I love it!

Today was my last appointment to check on my follicles! Tonight—we trigger. I’m pretty excited in case you can’t tell.  So, after I receive specific instructions from the nurse, my husband and I will have a trigger fest tonight. “They” said I could have a glass of wine, because this shot is intramuscular (yikes!), but I don’t really know if I care to. Okay, okay—to be honest, I won’t just want a glass!

So, my retrieval will be on Thursday! Big day! I wonder how many eggs they will retrieve. I wonder how many will fertilize. I wonder what my little embryos will look like! Hopefully the transfer is on day 3 (Sunday), because my husband can go with me. It might be on Tuesday, though. Either way, all is well as long as it’s what’s best for my microscopic, cell-dividing baby.

Wow, I cannot believe we have finally arrived here. This has been such a long time coming. I remember—two years ago—thinking and hoping I wouldn’t ever have to succumb to IVF. That acronym just sounds scary when you’re wondering if something is wrong with your reproductive system. People don’t just assume the conclusion of IVF. “There are other treatment methods. Infertility doesn’t automatically mean IVF.” True; it doesn’t. I was hoping it wouldn’t. And then, after about a year and a half, I was ready for IVF and hoping my new doctor wouldn’t steer me away from it!

I can’t believe I’m 25 years old—and I’m doing IVF! I’m so excited! I don’t think of it as a procedure I have to do because something is seriously wrong with me. I think of it as my journey to baby. Some people have sex; I do IVF. This journey is almost over (thank God), but it is something I will always hold in my heart. When I see my embryos, my babies, my children, I will never forget. I will love my children that much more. I will cherish my children that much more. I will be that much more grateful for my children. Every moment—good and BAD—I will cherish. Very few things in life will bring me the heartache this has brought me. I will always remember that and be grateful that if I can survive and conquer infertility, I can survive a lot of heartache. My babies are so precious to me already. They are my little miracles.

I’m just excited, hopeful, antsy, scared … I mean, this is the real deal.

Finally.

*** August 8, 2013: It’s safe to say I didn’t quite understand the 3- or 5-day transfer concept. 😉

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