I have moments of excitement, and then I wonder if the worst will happen.
Today is day 9 of stim, though I haven’t taken my meds for today yet. I think I will stim for 11-12 days, so my trigger will be Thursday or Friday—hopefully Thursday.
The timing of the tail-end of this cycle interferes with our travel to Massachusetts, but we have a back-up plan. Basically—at this point—we are going to miss our flight next Thursday afternoon. I’ll either be on bed rest from Thursday to Friday or Friday to Saturday. All of this is assuming knowing I’ll have a day 5 transfer. So, after my transfer—whichever day it is—I’ll sneak in my post-transfer acupuncture session and lay in the back seat of a rented car while my husband drives us to MA. Thank God for husbands, right?
I’m working with three doctors on this stim cycle. I don’t think any of them have used this protocol before. Actually, I know that two out of the three haven’t—but I’m pretty sure all of them haven’t. On Friday, one of the doctors told me how “unique” my situation is. Eh, I don’t really want to be unique. I’d prefer to be your run-of-the-mill 25-year-old with 20 eggs retrieved, 15-ish fertilized, and—let’s say—about 7 make it to the blastocyst stage. I’m worried about my egg quality. I hope this new protocol works; obviously, that’s the goal and reason why we’re using it. But I’m kind of a guinea pig/research project for my doctors—yikes. That worries me a bit.
And all the while, my response is always good. I’ve cranked out 17 and 25 eggs before. But this time? I HAVE THIS CYST THAT IS TAKING UP ALL THE ROOM ON MY LEFT OVARY. My right ovary looks like a beautiful batch of grapes. My left ovary is falling way behind. I mean, there are a few follicles, so I’m very thankful for that. This damn cyst is just eating everything up, though. So now, I’m worried that numbers won’t be on my side. I have about 12 follicles on the right, I think. And maybe four on the left …? There’s definitely a legitimate response, but I just need all the eggs I can get to find the good ones, you know? And then I remind myself that with my 25-egg retrieval last time, only half were mature anyway. Speaking of which, have you ladies heard of the dual trigger with Lupron and HCG—but way less HCG than just an HCG intramuscular trigger? That’s the trigger I used last time, and there were a few inquisitive comments made by nurses when they found out I was using that trigger. Inquisitive, as in skeptical. I don’t know; when I used the HCG intramuscular trigger, the mature vs. immature attrition and fertilization rates were much better. ANYWAY, my point is that I’m trying to make myself feel better about not having a batch of grapes on my left ovary because … well … it’s a shot in the dark anyway.
I could be a really happy girl one week from now while my babies are dividing. I could be a really worried girl too, though. All I can do is pray and hope that my egg quality is much better.
Moving on: I can’t comment on all of your blogs anymore! Grrr! I feel like such a bad blog friend. I try to post a comment, and the next screen delivers an error. I think it has something to do with the fact that I’m a WordPress blogger and you’re all Google …? Sometimes I sign into my Google account and comment, but that’s too complicated. Well, not really; I’m just being lazy. Okay, from now on I’ll comment via my Google account and identify myself as BHD so you know it’s me.
And—random prayer request other than my egg quality (Can you pray for my egg quality?): Sarabi’s brother is having some developmental health issues. He is such a sweet boy, and I know he is the heart and soul of his family. I used to be one of those people who didn’t understand the value a pet can bring to the family. Never in a million years did I think I could love a dog as much as I love Sarabi, or spend the time, effort, money she requires to be a well-behaved, healthy Boerboel. I can’t imagine going through what Ezekiel’s (Sarabi’s brother) family is going through right now. But—I have hope that he will get better and live a beautiful life.
Well, dear friends, thanks for reading once again. I’m praying for you girls all the time. Blessings to you!