I’m sorry, but this is the most ridiculous product I’ve ever heard of:
- Clearblue Advanced Pregnancy Test
Obviously, those peppy pregnancy test commercials ping at my heart every. single. time.
Either the lucky b**** is pregnant, or the relieved—MOST LIKELY MOST FERTILE WOMAN IN THE WORLD—woman isn’t pregnant … and is happy about it—because she’s just not ready to start her family yet WITH THAT BIG SMIRK ON HER FACE.
Okay, but this new Clearblue test’s commercial reeeeeally bothers me. Have you ladies seen it?
It claims it can tell you how far along you are in weeks. Sounds neat, right?
Then the commercial actresses’ correspondence goes like this:
Lucky Pregnant B****: “I’m pregnant!”
Lucky Pregnant B****: “Two weeks.” (Holds up two fingers.)
Does being two weeks pregnant even exist? So, I was two weeks pregnant the day of my egg retrieval, right? Can The Chosen Fertile Ones even know they’re pregnant at two weeks, i.e. THE DAY YOU OVULATE?! I’m pretty sure only IUI and IVFrs are over informed enough of their reproduction to know when they’re two weeks pregnant, i.e. not even pregnant yet but triggering/inseminating/retrieving, etc.
I thought that four weeks after the first day of your last menstrual cycle was four weeks pregnant. Am I missing something, or is this commercial and new product just—pardon me—f****** stupid?
P.S. Today is my Princess Sarabi’s 1st Birthday!!!