I almost got through the entire day without realizing that my “moment” on June 27, 2013, was supposed to be born today.
My baby was small, not thriving, barely even there really. But it was a good day, that Thursday.
It wasn’t meant to be, though. And I’m okay with that today. I don’t know; I just am.
My aunt told me back in June to protect my heart in eight months’ time when baby was scheduled to arrive. I was hoping I’d be okay anyway. I was hoping I’d have my take-home baby bump anyway.
But, it wasn’t meant to be. Nope, not today.
Instead I went to my Lupron evaluation appointment. My lining is 4-point-something. Nice and quiet. I have no cysts, thank Jesus. I did see a lovely batch of follicles, particularly on my right ovary. But I’m not going to talk about that right now.
Instead I went to work and received a phone call from my nurse informing me that “everything” looks good. Delestrogen starts tonight.
Instead I went for a nice run on the treadmill and plan to eat leftovers for dinner.
Because today wasn’t my baby’s day.
Instead, I think I ought to have myself a Christmas baby.