You have grown.
I still remember learning about your early cell division – which one of those four are you?
I have waited for you so long, and now you are here with me. Sometimes I can feel you – little pops here and there.
You grow strong. Life happens, work is challenging, seasons change … and you just grow.
But don’t grow too fast. Let me have you here – right here – in my belly for a bit. Let me have this season; these times. (I can feel you now as I lay here quietly.)
Your daddy is scooping me some ice cream. I hope he pours plenty of caramel sauce on top. Are you ready for dessert my sweet daughters?
Your daddy says he’s never seen me this happy. That is because I’ve never been this happy.
I know the whole idea is to have you here amongst the world – not tucked away in my womb forever. I know that you will grow, grow, grow. I know that my belly will get big and discomfort will be constant. There will be a time when you are ready to finally meet us.
And there will be even more “times” after that …
(Daddy forgot the caramel sauce. He’s pouring it now.)
My darlings: What I’m trying to say is that I’ve waited for this. I didn’t know if I’d get this. And now I have it. I have YOU – forever. And now we are nearly halfway there. It is bittersweet. I love you.
There is so much more …
But stay here (for some kind of forever?) …
Let me have this. Thank you for choosing me as your mommy. Thank you for fighting and staying here with me.
You are my joys, my loves.
Are you enjoying the ice cream? I thought it was perfect.